Johnny Rocket’s

Hey, every once in a while, you gotta have your fast food, right?  One day recently, a friend of mine wanted Johnny Rockets.  I’ve been to a Johnny Rockets a few times over the years – the first time I walked by one was in Crossgates Mall in Albany, and as I walked by, the poodle skirt clad waitresses were on the bar singing some doowop song.  But the first time I went to one was the first time I met my brother in law, and I got roaring sick from whatever it was I ate (a burger, probably), which didn’t leave a good impression on me.  Years later, I tried the one on Austin Street with LL, who swore it was good, but I continue to be unimpressed.  When Cheeburger Cheeburger opened, I was pretty happy that there was another option in the area for when you’re craving a burger, fries, milkshakes… a real burger shoppe type place, y’know? 

Anyway, when my friend Fudge wanted to go here, well, I’m not going to deny anyone the pleasure of eating what they’d like.  Luckily, I wasn’t hungry, so I saw no reason to put my foot down and say “I ain’t eating that crap.”

As soon as we sat down, I saw to my dismay that the calorie counts were next to everything.  I don’t eat much fast food, but when I do, I don’t want to know because as someone well versed in calories and what’s good for you, what’s not, I don’t want to know.  This is a discussion for another day, though, and though Fudge had been trying to watch his own weight, we opted to order the chili cheese fries to share.  Incredulous that they could be over 1,000 calories.

This tiny platter was surely not 1000 calories?  And the chili?  Totally canned, smelling like garbage, and pretty damn unappetizing.  I nibbled on a few fries but ignored the chili for the most part.

I still managed to take a sweet picture.  Neither Fudge nor I ate much of it since it was just that gross.

When Fudge’s Philly Cheesesteak arrived, we both peered at it, musing that we thought it’d be bigger.  Oh well.  It seemed alright but my snobby side says Philly cheesesteaks not from Philly are never that good.  Except Carl’s, Carl’s makes passable cheesesteaks, but still.

Not hungry and not really caring, I ordered a salad, thinking I could just take the rest home and pack it for lunch the next day.  But this salad was.. well, kind of gross.

Ok… really gross.  It’s great to know that they, like, use water to wash the lettuce, and all.  But did they have to leave so much of it on there?  The bottom of my plate was a half inch of water, and you know how when you leave certain lettuces in a plastic bag, and there’s condensation or you haven’t dried it properly so it’s very moist, it begins to darken and “cook”/break down?  Well, much of my salad looked like the above.  Cooked.

Disgusting.  The fried chicken bits were good, but it’s fried chicken dipped in ranch dressing, can’t really go wrong there in my opinion.  Otherwise, the salad was a waste – I don’t have the time or patience to order a salad at a restaurant and spend the entire meal picking out the bad bits.  If I wanted to do that, I’d stay home and go through the veggies that sometimes go bad in my refrigerator. 

Yvo says:  Seriously?  Why does anyone go here?  It’s disgusting.  The burgers aren’t that good (though I don’t have any photos, I’ve indeed eaten burgers here before), and the food, the overall atmosphere, everything is mediocre at best, mildly entertaining but super kitsch and just… unappealing.  I’ll pass, thanks, especially with the opening of Cheeburger Cheeburger nearby… there’s no reason for me to ever patronize this place again.  Next time, I’ll insist we eat there.
not recommended

Johnny Rocket’s
Multiple locations